Andrew Melder

**How cancelling our family music subscription provided the most meaningful connection to music in years**

Earlier this month, after increasing subscription costs for the family music subscription plan started to hit the value cap given our seemingly transient relationship with music itself; I cancelled our YouTube family subscription (yes that means we gets ads on YouTube too, but that’s a different article).

The biggest impact it had so far seemed to be what my wife and I use during car trips; my wife in particular as I’m more likely to be listening to a various podcast or two.

I still have a small digital music collection (a few purchases and some of my favourite live music YouTube videos) as well as a couple of old iPods laying around (a 30GB classic and 16GB Nano). While I have the music accessible via Plex, unfortunately it’s a little rough around the edges for music playback; especially when outside of the home connection.

In the mood to listen to some of my albums on my cheap but good set of wired IEMs, and not wanting to distract myself with smartphone things, I dug out the Nano and loaded it up. The experience is as good as it was when the iPod was in its prime.

However, I did think once I work out how to conveniently access our music and set it up on my family devices; the iPods might find their way back in the drawer. After all, I’m not against the convenience of modern wireless headphones (and own too many) and neither are my family, all of us owning our own set of wireless headphones or earbuds.

But taking a family trip today to a local retail outlet with my iPod Nano may have changed my tune.

A detour for context: My Dad

The reality is music was always a big part of my life growing up, my Dad was a musician after all.

He only performed covers and never wrote or played his own stuff (that I’m aware of), but my childhood and most of my young adult time was following him for gigs with his various bands over the years; then on his own once he got a laptop and setup the MIDI backing tracks.

There was never any question about which household had the loudest home stereo setup in the neighbourhood. Initially a classic Marantz stack until one of the speakers blew; which then prompted Dad to hook it up to his PA gear with Roland speakers with a 15 inch woofer and horns on each side. Looking back now, my geekiness with gadgets and technology gear is probably mimicked via him; there was always some new amp, speaker or guitar gear coming in and out of the place.

While we always loved each other, my Dad and I are different personalities; stereotypical extrovert vs introvert clashes. While I always knew my Dad was a good singer and performer; shamefully in my late teens and early twenties looking to forge my own identity as most young people do, I found myself increasingly feeling the cringe towards Dad’s passion.

Thankfully I (for the most part) kept those feelings to myself being an introvert an all. However as Dad got more into the technology side and wanting to record his covers, I helped him as the stereotypical family tech support but often through gritted teeth. To his credit he did get through my occasional stubbornness (often with his own much higher level of stubbornness) and recorded quite a few songs that he would have me burn to CDs at the time which he would give to his musician friends, as they would to him with their recordings.

My own kids are coming into their teen years now, and remember my Dad playing and signing songs as they were growing up. Unfortunately he’s battled deteriorating health in recent years, no longer singing in the last few years and now needing permanent care due to Dementia. He’s thankfully physically comfortable and can still remember all of us, however we all know what lays ahead in the time to come.

Revival of the significance of music

My iPod Nano is actually my Dad’s iPod Nano. One I loaded up with his favourites ripped from his CD collection that he loved to play through his Bluetooth speaker.

It’s also got 20 or so of his own recordings on it.

This is something I did not forget. I even made sure to get an extract of his songs off from the iPod after he went into permanent care last year just in case. I knew they were there; however with everything going on over the past year I just chose to not acknowledge them mentally at the moment.

With the Nano having Bluetooth capability, I synced it up to the car quickly and used it for music on the 30-40 minute drive to the outlet today. Starting to play some Anderson .Paak before we took off, I gave the iPod to my wife in the passenger seat as I drove and told her to browse through and select a song. Afterwards, she proceeded to pass it back to our kids for them to choose the next song.

Sure technically you can do this with a phone and wireless CarPlay or Android Auto, but with our phones containing so much personal information who’s comfortable passing it between passengers these days? I would for my wife but not with the kids :)

It’s when my son scrolls through the artist list that he notices my Dad’s name “hey, Papa’s got songs on this” and proceeds to start playing his songs. Old memories meets new memories. My son and daughter listening carefully then start remarking almost concurrently “wow, Papa can really sing!”

Fair to say I’m taken back by all of it. I struggle to maintain my composure, even now as I write and recall the moments. Hearing my Dad singing, my kids amazement at him like it’s the first time they are hearing him. My wife shares this with our family today:

They know they have heard him sing before, but they were so young and the memories are hazy and vague. I finally recognise that in the past few years they’ve only known their papa slowly becoming physically and mentally different, this is a capsule for the Papa they knew but struggle to hold onto with the changes in recent years.

Future

I don’t know if my kids long term music habits will change as a result of this. All I know is they both now want an iPod of their own with their Papa’s songs on it, as well as others from their favourite artists.

With the costs of music, as well as the costs of iPods with their explosion in popularity in modern times, I’m sure the logical step is that streaming music offers great value for what it does offer. I don’t want to ignore that for many people streaming music works and is valuable.

However, I’m hoping not only to influence my kids musical journey but also re-engage with my own. To collate a small, personal collection of music that matters to me and my family, not playlists saved from an essentially unlimited catalog. To slow down and rediscover the art of the album, and the stories that can be weaved through individual songs when put together by a truly good artist.

Some people have done that through vinyl over the past decade. Some are even getting back into CDs and even tapes. I personally don’t think the specific medium matters that much as long as the outcome is moving music away from just background noise, towards memories and moments.